How to Cross the Street in HCMC

Ho Chi Minh City (aka: Saigon) traffic is about as intense as Bangkok traffic with motorbikes whizzing every which way, cars and minibuses darting around, and cyclos (backwards rickshaws) thrown in the mix just for fun. There’s one significant difference in HCMC, however, and that’s a serious shortage of stoplights. The result is a chaotic free-for-all which is highly entertaining to watch, but also panic inducing when you’re an unfortunate participant. Without traffic control features, motorists jet directly into intersections without looking, then engage evasive maneuvers to avoid imminent collisions. It would certainly be easier to just look first, but they seem to enjoy the thrill. And it really is quite exciting to ride around on the back of a motorbike, but only after telling yourself that it’s not real.
Crossing the street on foot, however, is a different and more difficult challenge because the continuous stream of motorbikes prevents any possible break in traffic. The skill that must be honed requires you to step right onto the pavement, even while every sensible instinct in your body screams at you to get the hell back on the curb, and then walk slow and steady to the other side. Look up if you can avoid soiling yourself, because slight adjustments in pace are often necessary. The slow and steady gait enables most drivers to gauge your movement and compensate their direction and speed. The remaining drivers assume just hit you, which is why slight adjustments are often wise. It’s a lot like playing Frogger, only you can’t stop (because you’ll get hit and run over) or go in reverse (because you’ll get hit and run over) or try again with another life (because you’re dead).

Outside of the notable street situation, HCMC is surprisingly mainstream for a large South East Asian city. Although still communist, the “open door” economic reforms from the 1980s have spread like wildfire and the city looks and feels capitalistic. There are no McDonald’s (thank god) or 7-11s yet, but many foreign franchises have been permitted (the Vietnamese love KFC more than… well, they love it) and successful local retailers are also discovering the chain game. Brand name products are abundant and it’s a common sight to see girls sporting Gucci handbags and smoking Marlboro Lights. Ah man, if Ho Chi Minh was still alive to see this, it’d kill him!